Overcoming the pressure to always be productive: embracing balance and self-care
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Productivity in today’s world
In today’s capitalist world, we so often feel pressure to make everything we do “productive” or “worthwhile”. We feel the need to always do more, be more, and fill every free moment to keep up with the busy pace of life – sound familiar? When we do slow down, it’s often with the caveat that it’s “worthwhile” because the rest will make us more productive in the long run.
If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, frantic, drained, or constantly running against the clock, you’re not alone. We can go days, weeks, even months without truly slowing down and allowing ourselves the space to simply enjoy the moment. We spend our free time catching up on personal to-dos, scrolling on social media, doing a little more work so we can “get ahead”, and our personal enjoyment falls to the wayside. Maybe you feel guilty for taking time for yourself or maybe you simply don’t believe you have time to relax when there’s always more to do. I can relate.
But here’s the honest truth, you are enough when you are simply breathing. Yes, breathing. This may make you uncomfortable. It definitely doesn’t align with the western, capitalist mentality. And for that reason, I won’t be surprised if you brushed it aside and turned back to your seemingly never ending to-do list. But I encourage you to at the very least pause now and notice what thoughts, beliefs, or judgements show up. What’s your gut response to the idea that you are of value even when you are doing nothing?
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Relearning lightness
When I first started my coach training with the Newfield Network, we were asked to reflect on our capacity for “daily lightness”. To contemplate our personal practices— or lack thereof—of relaxation and regeneration. This was interesting for me because while it felt quite natural, I realized how much work I have done over the past few years to get to a place where I can now allow myself space for relaxation and play. When I first moved to Serbia, I was in a completely different mental, emotional and physical state. I was overworked, burned out, and running away from a work culture and lifestyle I could no longer maintain. I remember when my own coach first asked me to set aside a half hour each day to “play” – to do something that served absolutely no purpose. I was taken aback and honestly felt very uncomfortable. I realized I didn’t know what lit me up anymore and I felt an incredible sense of guilt doing something I didn’t feel was “useful” or “productive”.
It’s taken me a while to unpack my relationship to productivity. To begin to see that I’m enough just as I am. And, honestly, it’s something I’m still working on. What’s helped me the most is exploring and uncovering my core beliefs around work and my value and self-worth. I remember when someone first said to me: “you don’t need to be busy to get things done.” It was such a simple statement, but it really made me stop and think. I realized I believed I needed to constantly fill my time, be doing something, to be seen as useful and successful and contribute something of value to my community. Over time, I have slowly deconstructed this belief and come to see how my perception of self-worth was intimately tied to how much I did or did not achieve each day. Despite what society continues to tell me, with daily practice, I have come to accept and embrace that I can:
say no to more work or engagements that don’t light me up
pick up a new hobby without making it a side hustle
paint in my spare time without producing a work of art
enjoy a mid-day cap nap without promising I’ll be more productive after
Inviting in what feels good
In this way, my mindset has shifted significantly since that period and I now see relaxation and rest as not only nice, but essential. Not because they’ll make me more productive, but because I deserve to enjoy my life and my life is ultimately not my work. That my inner well-being isn’t selfish. I see the value in slowing down to actually enjoy the home I have created, be present with my loved ones, soak up the sunshine and sea water. Why? Because these moments are what I cherish and hold most dear. They are what make life rich and memorable. And, they are what enable me to show up fully, with love, energy, compassion in my relationships and community.
When was the last time you did something for yourself that you didn’t consider “useful” or “productive”? If you can’t remember or it’s been awhile, I invite you to carve out even 10 min of your day to do something that brings you joy and a sense of peace. If you aren’t sure where to begin, try asking yourself:
When do I feel the lightest?
When do I feel the most at peace?
Start there, and as you practice, it will come more naturally over time. You will begin to see and sense a shift in your own orientation, mindset, behavior.
If this post resonated with you and you’re ready to stop feeling overwhelmed by work and society’s call to constantly be productive, I’d love to support you through 1:1 coaching. You can check out what I offer or send me a message–no strings attached.